When I dreamed of having a family I thought it was going to be a fairytale. (I'll wait for you to finish laughing and wiping the tears.) It's hard. HARD I say. When the 3 kiddos came into the house I realized it was going to be a little busy..but now? I'm happy to get a chance to get out of my pajamas most days. See how I didn't say everyday? It's stressful, and there are nights when I lose sleep thinking about how I can make it better. I would never admit to this but I think I am way over my head. Is this a normal thing or am I not meant to be a mother? The 3 year old is in a tantrum stage and the twins are in the "food? formula? Ha! I rule this house and I will refuse to eat just to make you lose your shit and cry" mood. They have decided to not eat, at all. Formula? getting MAYBE 21 oz on a good day. This week all 3 have a cold. Snot is pouring out from everywhere!
Last month I put Big Sis in 3K and she loves it. She goes Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. She is learning alot and is SO smart. I couldn't be prouder of her. She has made friends and loves them very much. She is starting to learn to pick up after herself, but has learned to throw herself on the floor when told to do so. Ahhh...it's wonderful.
Twin S is teething. So not only am I wiping snot every .0000002 seconds I carry a drool cup with me. She is close to crawling and babbles..all day long I hear "bababababababababababa" and "dadadadadadadadadada" but do I hear mamamamamama? Nooooooooo. Yes, I am still working on it. We did have her evaluated for physical and occupational therapy and we were told she's fine. Yay!
Twin E on the other hand is a whole other story. We went to see a pedicatric eye doctor and we were told she was blind. My heart broke in two. I cried, I argued and in the end I ran the doctors out of the room. I wasn't finished so I called her neurologist and had a referral to a neurosurgeon the same one that did brain surgery on Twin S. He agreed to do a CT scan for me and find out what was REALLY going on because up to this point I had been told so many things. "She's blind" "She's brain dead" "Her brain isn't going to develop, good luck" I was tired of hearing it all and wanted to know answers. After the CT scan he walked into the room, I was holding Twin E so tight I thought I was going to break her, and the words came out of his mouth..."She is going to be okay, not perfect, but okay. " Yayy! After my heart started pumping again we made plans. During the abuse that the family caused it made Twin E have multiple strokes. One stroke was on the vision part of the brain, but with rehab it can possibly get better. She has been in rehab for awhile now and I can see so much progress. I am so proud of her. She is starting to hold her head up better now and can hold toys in her hand if we put it there. Developmentally she is at 1 month old level but getting better every day. Please continue your prayers for her.
We received a phone call today from the adoption department of Social Services and we will be having another homestudy on the 30th of March. That gives me 3 weeks to make my house look perfect. We are hoping we can adopt these girls and we are waiting for a court date...although it's in the judges hands on if we can keep them or not, I don't see how he could go any other way.
This weekend it the Aiken Triple Crown kickoff and we are going to the Aiken Trials. Living in Aiken you HAVE to love horses that's what this whole city is about. Luckily, the 3 year old loves horses and I hope she enjoys the races.
Well, there's a Readers Digest version of my life...I promise pictures and more post are coming soon. Hope everyone is doing well :)
link | posted by Mrs. TSB at 2:18 PM
3 Comments:
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had this to say:
You are a saint! I don't know how you do it. As an adoptive parent of a child with a correctable medical condition, I feel your pain. Thank God E will be ok. I went hrough therapies with Michael. It really does help.
Good luck with the adoption. It will be the ahhpiest day of your life, next to the girls coming home with you..and oh yeah, your wedding LOL.
Alison- 11:30 PM
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had this to say:
Make sure you take care of your own conditions while worrying about your young 'uns.
- 8:10 PM
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had this to say:
You are living the fairytale dream, you just can't see it for all the snot right now. Being a parent is hard work, very hard work. I think it's the hardest job one can have. My kids are 17, 13 and 10, and everyday I wonder if I have done things right. All one can do is do the best you can do. And it sounds as if you have everything covered. In 17 yrs of being a mom, I have learned one thing, well several, but one thing that has really changed for me. I always had the perfect house. Everything in its place, all shiny. Well, I have learned that having the perfect house is not important at all. Kids grow up tooooo fast to worry about something so petty. That game of ball is way more important. One more lesson I have learned is Don't sweat the small stuff. As long as everyone is smiling,and loving and has clean underwear all is good. So live,love and smile.
a.K.a lynn_in_md2004- 7:41 PM
